RE: [libreoffice-marketing] Re: Need help with EN text and improving it

> One of our mailing-list team members will then 
> respond and try to address the details of your inquiry.
"mailing team subscriber"? Not sure here. 
Perhaps you could even drop this sentence.

Rest looks good.

regards
Dhiren

> To: marketing@global.libreoffice.org
> From: marc@marcpare.com
> Subject: [libreoffice-marketing] Re: Need help with EN text and improving it
> Date: Mon, 19 Nov 2012 12:51:40 -0500
>
> Thanks Dhiren, Ben and Fridolin
>
> Ben: every day (Ben)
> Fridolin: removed "your" first sentence
> Dhiren: sentence restructuring. Marc: will blend with text.
> Dhiren: "It would be great if we could point to a user forum for queries 
> and feedback instead of the link to the mailing lists.
> Let me know if I can help out in that initiative." Marc: LibreOffice are 
> coming. They should make their appearance in either late Dec or 
> early-mid Jan. We cannot point anyone to any forum right now.
> Fridolen suggests: no need to justify not replying. Marc: I agree. I 
> would shorten even more!
>
> Note: as this will be sent for Pootle (translation) we should avoid 
> "contractions", "possessives" and "colloquialisms" (Marc re: 
> colloquialisms: it does not mean that we should not use them, but we 
> should avoid them if possible). This will make it easier to translate.
>
>
> ===== NEW =====
>
> Thank you very much for your e-mail and interest in LibreOffice.
>
> Due to the increasing popularity of the free office suite, we receive a 
> lot of support requests every day.
>
> Unfortunately, we cannot reply personally to every e-mail, as our 
> engagement in the project is completely on a volunteer basis and in our 
> spare time, thus leaving no time to respond to individual requests. 
> (Marc: *** THIS IS A RUN-ON SENTENCE ***)
>
> Marc: suggest
>
> Unfortunately, we cannot reply personally to every e-mail, as our 
> engagement in the project is completely voluntary and restricted to our 
> spare time.
>
> (Marc: there is no reason for ", thus leaving no time to respond to 
> individual requests." as we have already said at the start of the 
> sentence: "we cannot reply personally to every e-mail" )
>
> However, the Community does offer a large variety of mailing
> lists to support its users. We have compiled an overview at
>
> http://www.libreoffice.org/get-help/mailing-lists/
>
> Please have a look at these pages, and send your inquiry to the 
> applicable mailing list.
>
> Chances are high that you will get a positive response very soon.
>
> (Marc: I like the short version but it still leaves the OP (original 
> poster) in doubt as to whether they will receive an answer: How about:
>
> One of our mailing team members will then respond and try to address the 
> details of your inquiry.
>
> So the text would now read (with all amendments so far):
>
> ===== NEW =====
>
> Thank you very much for your e-mail and interest in LibreOffice.
>
> Due to the increasing popularity of the free office suite, we receive a 
> lot of support requests every day. Unfortunately, we cannot reply 
> personally to every e-mail, as our engagement in the project is 
> completely voluntary and restricted to our spare time.
>
> However, the Community does offer a large variety of mailing
> lists to support its users. We have compiled an overview at
>
> http://www.libreoffice.org/get-help/mailing-lists/
>
> Please have a look at these pages, and send your inquiry to the 
> applicable mailing list. One of our mailing-list team members will then 
> respond and try to address the details of your inquiry.
>
> ===== NEW =====
>
>
> ===== ORIGINAL =====
>
> Thank you very much for your e-mail and your interest in LibreOffice.
>
> Due to the increasing popularity of the free office suite, we receive
> lots of support requests day by day. Unfortunately, we can't reply
> personally to every e-mail, as our engagement in the project is
> completely on a volunteer basis and in our spare time. This often
> demands several hours of volunteer engagement per day, leaving no time
> to respond to individual requests.
>
> However, the Community does offer a large variety of mailing lists to
> support its users. We have compiled an overview at
>
> http://www.libreoffice.org/get-help/mailing-lists/
>
> Please have a look at these pages, and send your inquiry to our mailing
> lists. Chances are high that your problem then will be solved very soon.
>
> ===== ORIGINAL =====
>
> How does that read?
>
> Cheers,
>
> Marc
>
>
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